Go Darke

Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it

Daily Journal

Minimalist email

How did I let it get so bad?

As indictments go, this is about as serious as it gets. 1218 unread emails.

I like to tell people that I have an inbox zero policy. ha ha ha ha ha. I also tell people I eat Paleo. My life is such a lie.

*select all*

*move to trash*

2018-01-30-image-8.jpg

 

There is no real ‘good’ way to tackle this that won’t suck the limited will I have to live from my already brittle bones and saggy exterior.

Besides, none of this ‘sparks’ joy in my life.

I’m all about Marie Kondo these days, despite having never actually having watched any of her stuff. But I imagine, metaphorically… my inbox is like that ‘bad’ apartment with the 400lbs shut in that has to be removed by the fire department by breaking down one of the exterior walls and then winching said victim (of their own malaise) down to the relative safety of the terrafirma. Or am I thinking about a different show?

In any event, my strategy is as follows…

… if its really important they’ll mail again.

 

 

 

11 Comments

  1. jim-

    June 26, 2019 at 12:28 pm

    I’ve only got 650 unreads. I thought I was bad, but you’ve more than doubled me.

    1. Jo

      June 26, 2019 at 9:45 pm

      I am actually quite competitive like that. Especially when it comes to any form of email malingering and/or prodding the buttock of chaos (with a pointy stick).

      I hereby declare myself the winner. And award myself this giant golden star… which I will now proudly display on my ample forehead.

      Yay me.

      1. jim-

        June 26, 2019 at 9:52 pm

        High brow, low brow, or is it a sloper? You are a starJo

      2. Jo

        June 26, 2019 at 9:55 pm

        I like to think of it as something that initially looks eminently playable, but then drops off rapidly and hits the batter in the shin and he gets to walk/hobble on as a result.

        But thank you.

      3. Jo

        June 26, 2019 at 9:57 pm

        I just realized that makes zero sense. Probably because its late here and read that as ‘slider’… which made me think of baseball. Ha ha. I’m going to bed. Good night.

  2. westcoastwoman

    June 26, 2019 at 3:18 pm

    You always manage to make me smile, this made me actually laugh out loud.
    I have both of Marie Kondo’s books neither of which ‘spark’ joy, one of which I read (to the point of how to store your underwear) and they now constitute part of the clutter I was trying to control.

    I had over 3,000 emails in my inbox…….until when our computer was being serviced they were ‘mysteriously’ vanished. A forced intervention, I was going through my 266 messages that have since backed up when I came upon yours.

    is it really that easy?* select all* * move to trash*…..thanks for the motivation:)

    1. Jo

      June 26, 2019 at 9:30 pm

      Right back at ya! Your comment made me smile. Thank you! I find it weirdly comforting that Marie Kondo, in her own way, both giveth… and taketh away. The hallmark of any true ideology. I don’t suppose her adherents are called Kondoments? Because that would be awesome.

      Good luck with your email! Ctrl A for the win. Unless you’re on a Mac. In which case it would Cmd A.

      …In any event @#% A!

  3. Michelle Louring

    June 27, 2019 at 6:40 am

    Once you reach 500 unread emails, there’s nothing more you can do.

    1. Jo

      June 27, 2019 at 6:49 am

      Is that like an email event horizon from which there is no return?

      1. Michelle Louring

        June 27, 2019 at 6:53 am

        I would say so.
        If you have reached that point, how are you even going to catch up?

      2. Jo

        June 27, 2019 at 6:54 am

        I agree. There’s no way too catch up. The only way forward it to purge and start over.

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