Go Darke

Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it

Fundamental Joeyism

Educational toys

Remember when we were kids… (there is more than a dollop of era assumption here) and we rode our bikes, and the only real guideline from our parents was, be back before dark. But for hours and hours they had no idea where you were. Exploring storm water drains, climbing precarious trees over to treacherous ravines to attach a rope so you could swing across the aforementioned chasm, catching crabs (actual crustaceans, eh… not the venereal disease) in the river. Being reckless with fireworks and NEVER wearing sunscreen…

… and we turned out fine. The ones of us who survived I mean. I also presume like 99.9% of us did survive this laissez faire approach to parenting.

Of course now we bubble wrap our kids. As do I, obviously… because I don’t want to go to prison and have the structural integrity of my sphincter stress tested by my room-mate. Which is quite a weird thing (when you think about it), that the state might send people with guns to arrest you for trying to give your kid a good childhood experience. One generations freedom is another generations abuse.

I have no idea what the middle ground is of course. Maybe giving them butter-knives to play with? I mean… you can’t really injure yourself with a butter-knife… eh… can you? (in the context of the comic)

*slurps his almond-milk cappuccino*

I could probably injure myself with a butter knife.

*looks down at the Elsa band-aid on his toe*

I injure myself walking these days. Also Frozen band-aids are (apparently) the only brand we stock in this house… it probably subtracts from my general manliness. (which is already quite a low-ball figure)

Oh well…

21 Comments

  1. tara caribou

    at

    Yep. We survived juuuust fine. Personally, I don’t bubble wrap my kids. They only electrocute themselves once, learn proper cutting techniques, that gravel embedded in flesh hurts but does not mean we stop, ehhh and lots of other things.

    Not long ago my mom and I were discussing this… how she never knew where me or my siblings were. I remember frequently walking the four miles to the beach… alone or with my younger sister, when I was eight. I never asked. I just went if I wanted to. The river was about ten minutes walk away (mostly because of bushwhacking through Alaskan wilderness…. in which I grew up in). Now that I think about it… how did I never get eaten by a bear or stomped by a moose or fall through the ice or anything?? Seems like SOMEthing should have happened. But nope. I just let my kids run around and be wild and learn how to adapt to their surroundings.

    Maybe they’ll make it too.

    1. Jo

      at

      I hope they make it. I mean when you don’t post for a while I immediately imagine that you’ve been eaten by bears or snatched off an ice flow by an Orca. (lets be honest, if Tara HAD to pick a way to end it… that might be it)

      1. tara caribou

        at

        Get out of my head!!!!

      2. Jo

        at

        Ha ha. Sorry… I’ll leave now… its cleaner than I expected.

      3. tara caribou

        at

        That’s because I keep all the hall doors closed. Open one up and you’d find out quickly how dirty I can be. Organized…. but a little dirty.

      4. Jo

        at

        Why do I get the feeling that’s a mixed metaphor. Ha ha.

      5. tara caribou

        at

        Was it??!! lol
        Wellll you DO know me…

      6. jim-

        at

        Is that Schrödingers closet?

  2. jim-

    at

    ”… and we turned out fine.”. Hahaha. Good one!
    Of course I’m kidding. I would let my kids live that way but my wife is too afraid. So were professional supervisors.

    1. Jo

      at

      You are frustrating me!

      Every time you reply I hope its something that I can reply with ‘Ok boomer’ to.

      Its just not working out for me. Damn you Jim.

      1. jim-

        at

        Ok boomer. Your get it… haha. How’s it going your way Jo?

      2. Jo

        at

        I’m good. I think…

        (I mean as long as I don’t think too hard)

        How is Jim? Do you guys have snow yet?

      3. jim-

        at

        Just got our first snow yesterday. Ok, I’m done. Only five more months to go… I need to get a left handed snow sifter…

      4. Jo

        at

        I am embarrassed to say I have never shoveled snow before. Its a balmy 89F here today. A few scattered clouds. Slight chance of bullets though… but thats pretty much a South African staple…

      5. jim-

        at

        Don’t you have gun control? Hah. Life in the city. Everyone where I live has guns galore but we’re in the country. And there really cheap here too. Never shoveled snow? It’s worth it.
        “Good morning from South Africa! I’m feather dusting my driveway today”

      6. Jo

        at

        Technically yes. We have gun control. But no real enforcement. I mean we have a police force… kinda… its hard to imagine a more useless, corrupt and pathetic organization though.

        Venezuela has the highest crime rate in the world of 84.86 deaths per 100,000 citizens
        followed by….

        *drum roll please*

        South Africa (77.02)
        Honduras (75.84)
        Afghanistan (73.26)
        Trinidad and Tobago (73.15)
        Brazil (69.48)
        El Salvador (68.63)
        Namibia (68.14)
        Syria (66.91)

      7. jim-

        at

        That’s pretty good when you can outshine a stereotype. Mogadishu has nothing on you.

      8. Jo

        at

        The Somalians live in fear here. We (I use the collective term quite loosely) regularly take our frustrations out on them by burning down their homes and businesses. We hate foreigners. Especially ones from the rest of Africa…

        Don’t worry Venezuela… we are gunning for you next…

  3. saynotoclowns

    at

    i need to come back to this.
    this also reminds me that the only band aids we ever seemed to have in our house years ago were Shrek ones. Glow in the dark. Sadly have not had such choice since we moved here. Just seems so wrong as i type it out.

    1. Jo

      at

      There are glow in the dark Shrek ones? THAT is waaaaaay better! Shrek is my spirit animal. Well (original) Shrek that lived in a swamp and hated society. Until that damn donkey messed up his life.

      1. saynotoclowns

        at

        YESSSS!!!! But granted, this was a while ago sadly.
        That is cool. I loved the first Shrek. Changed my life. Restored my hope in children’s movies. I will never forget when Fiona started singing in the woods, and I was angry thinking, oh my gosh, not a cheesy musical, please God no. Then when the bird exploded…it made my decade. So happy.
        Maybe I have said too much? hehe

        AWww I do love the donkey. He is hilarious. And I do love donkeys.

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