The God terrarium
Do you ever wonder why God didn’t give us a nicer planet?
Not to sound ungrateful or anything. (too late?) I mean, statistically there are (like) a googolplex less hospitable planets out there in the… eh… multi-verse. And while earth is nice enough to have, you know, an atmosphere and liquid water and is, like the littlest of the three bears porridge, not too hot and not too cold, it is… when you really think about it, quite hostile towards humans.
I mean less so now, since we have beaten back nature with the pointy stick and the flame and… eh… the anti-biotic. But if you were one of our common ancestors sitting on a rock (scratching your tape worm infested butthole) near the Great Rift Valley (where absolutely EVERYTHING wanted to maim or kill you) would you have been feeling a bit short changed?
I mean probably not… because you were probably running for your life from something fierce with a mouth full of sharp teeth… or cramping from your gut full of parasites, while you poked around in the humus for roots and grubs. Imagining God and his machinations was likely quite low on your list of things to dwell on.
Personally I think its quite a weird way to run your start up. But then again I am not a deity, and therefore don’t really appreciate the numen like management of your… eh… hobby terrarium.
I often think of my ancient ancestor. And how terrible it must have been to live without espresso. Or toilet paper. Or have sex without curated pubic hair. *shudder*
But they got through it. And… despite the odds made it. To consider the unbroken chain of events that must have happened for any of us to be here… its a mind-numbing contemplative exercise.
And, lets be honest, I am super grateful to be here now. Doing my thing… which is mostly having this big existential crisis about the nature of being alive. But also, I think, doing some cool stuff along the way. I mean its nice than all my familial peeps survived… and then raped… eh… consensually bred so that I could… umm… dedicate my life to hedonism and consumerism… and Fundamental Joey-ism (probably the most important of the -isms)
Hmmm. Although now I’m thinking about what part sexual assault played a role in me being here.
Do you think when we’re dead, we can hit the rewind button and watch it all in high definition 4K from the beginning. I imagine it might be quite a white knuckle affair at some junctures. Survival by the breadth of a whisker.
Is hell where the whole thing is narrated by Sir David Attenborough and we can’t skip the boring bits?
I need to turn my life around and be good from here on out. I can barely sit through two hours of anything these days.