Go Darke

Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it

Fundamental Joeyism, Libertarianism

Right turn half way down

In my dream last night I was old and one of my daughters sat us down to tell us something important.

Mom, Dad, I think I’m a lesbian.

Me: Oh thank Christ, I thought you were going to tell us you’ve become a vegan!

I click ‘like’ next to this dream, because apparently my subconscious is pretty damn woke. But also at the same time quite prejudiced. Which is quite a nice juxtaposition to have. Ying and Yang as it were. I almost never dream. Well… until recently. Going Ketogenic for two weeks I had the weirdest, most vivid dreams. Driving back home I crashed out of ketosis in a big way, since all I wanted to do on my long mind-numbingly boring road-trip was stuff food into my word-hole, which included an embarrassing amount of store bought carbohydrates, so technically this dream is not batched together with that particular bout of unconscious delirium.

Still… I thought I’d record it for posterity.

Latently, I have this suppressed fear that I’m going to grow up surrounded not only by an overabundance of estrogen… but also that everyone in this domicile is going to become meat phobic. My wife is a recovering vegetarian. I worry that my days are numbered and that one day I’ll be forced into this dietary cloister to wear the habit of familial conformity.

And while I realize that sounds dramatic… fears don’t have to make sense.

Also my butt hurts.

The missus was due to surf the crimson wave this week, so I heroically stepped up to the plate last night. Wait… does that fall under Tmi? She doesn’t read my blog so I think I’ll be okay. In any event, after giving it… like 60% at the gym yesterday I was likely in no condition to perform at my peak… things in my gluteus maximus and surrounds were already starting to twinge. Still, sometimes you need to be a hero.

I mean I was totally crap. Gassing out at the five minute mark. (almost 20% less than the six minute average) But its the thought that counts right? Ha ha ha.

I laugh at my disparagement. This morning I’m limp-shuffling round the house like a newly minted sodomite. I mean, there is some assumption there on my part since in my forty… two years that part of my anatomy has been strictly exit only. Except for my doctor once… who poked around in there for a bit… which likely jaded me to a repeat experience. Still, maybe I shouldn’t knock something I have no appreciation of.

Like Brussel sprouts. Some people love ’em. Admittedly weird people you probably shouldn’t be friends with. But they are out there. Hiding in plain sight…

… or maybe like closet Republicans.. who want their party to be run sane people. But are too afraid that they’ll end up on some sort of McCarthist hit list. Ha ha. (I’ve been watching the CPAC lowlights reel)

Come over to the Libertarian side. We have guns, marijuana and conservative fiscal beliefs. I mean you’ll have to give up your warmongering and embrace the immigrating browns from beyond the wall… but those are (probably) good things. We also hate taxes. And (apparently) roads. And libraries. And mindboggling deficits. We have this (kooky) utopian idea that spontaneous order will just erupt (like mount Etna) in wake of a government lumpectomy and that everything will be awesome, if only you’ll burn down everything you’ve ever known. (I’m totally selling it, aren’t I?)

I love Banksy so much.

Seriously, I have no idea why peeps are so reticent to join our cause.

Also, this needs to be said. Rand Paul is not a libertarian. He’s just a wanker. And should be put on a list indicating him as such.

Lists are totally fine. As long as I’m the one in charge of making them.

Yes, I realize we’ve taken a right(ish) turn here. Although I’m still of the notion that these are more centrist ideas these days. Maybe. I obviously move in circles that constantly reinforce my belief system… which I imagine to be precariously balanced between two sides. I’m like that annoying kid that wants to break up the fight in the school yard… when everyone else is baying for blood. Lets just be friends guys (and tear down the school instead). *gets hit with a bottle*

Anyways, both sides of the political divide seem to have a maddening sense of collectivism these days. I mean it probably has always been thus. I’m just more aware of it these days. Probably because I’m so old now. And wise.

Moving swiftly along and since we are now deep into weird segues.

How amazing is The Expanse!!!

This poster just drips with cheese, since the series not even remotely this cutesy.

I hardly ever watch TV anymore. I think the last thing I REALLY enjoyed was Season one of Stranger Things. ha ha. I am supremely difficult to please. The Expanse has been recommended to me loads of times… and I remember watching the trailer on YouTube… and thinking… ‘yeah, whatever, I’m not wasting my time on this..’.

Seriously, whoever spliced that trailer together should be shot! I don’t advocate for mob justice very often. But in this case it is deeply deserved.

Also I’m still angry about the Sci-Fi Channel changing is name to the stylized Syfy. (after all these years, ha ha) Seriously, Dante is adding in a layer for you guys. So really, anything Syfy attaches his logo to nowadays makes me deeply skeptical. Besides, good Science Fiction is hard to come by. Nigh near impossible really. Its a genre filled with steaming hot garbage *cough Star Trek Discovery cough* so I wasn’t expecting much.

Damn did I have to eat humble pie.

Its amazing. I actually can’t remember the last time I binge watched a series. In any event, I also realize I am WAAAAY behind the curve on this… but if you’ve never watched it before and you have a penchant for Science Fiction, this is definitely the one to watch.

Anyways, I’m now just waffling on because I have things that need doing… time to go.





  1. Over Soil


    Just to be your annoying well read friends from across the pond, here’s a couple of lists: A keto diet can cause kidney stones, low blood pressure, nutrient deficiencies, an increased risk of heart disease, social isolation, constipation and of course therefore butt damage. Here’s another list: A vegan diet is nutrient rich, lowers blood sugar levels, improves kidney function, protects against certain cancers and heart disease, reduces pain from arthritis, keeps a clear skin, helps save the planet, of course it’s kindness personified towards other sentient beings and tastes delish cake 🍰 or humble pie. 🥧 Oh, but now you’ve done it, for I love to dine on a big dollop of clap shot and pan fried brussel sprouts with flaked almonds, slathered in thick onion gravy and a jug of fresh mint sauce on the side.
    “More tea vicar?” ☕️ Banksy, isn’t he that nice arty guy who lives just up road from ‘ere?

    1. Jo


      Yeah Keto long term is probably not a good idea for a human being. Two weeks was quite enough for me, although truthfully I felt amazing… better than I have in a long time… so I understand the appeal.

      I’m not sure I agree with you on veganism being better for the planet… I don’t think we can grow enough food to feed everyone… and there is good evidence to suggest that crop farming (with the insane amount of fertiliser and pesticides we use) is worse for the planet than meat. The amount of death perpetrated by a combine harvester rolling through a field is unimaginably high. I suppose it depends on how you rank life? Is a mouse or voles life less important than a beef cow?

      Truthfully I am a layman and an inexpert at these things. Still, I believe there is certainly room for improvement in the way we currently get our food.

      1. Over Soil


        It’s the maths of the thing: You have to grow loads of stuff 10x to feed a cow, compared to eating that amount from the field. Plus it’s all monoculture… Anyways, you probably have time to research this yourself if you are interested in saving the world (I say world, meaning of humans, as Earth can do without us). 🌍

  2. tara caribou


    Okayyyyy so for the record, fellow libertarian…. I love Rand Paul and I was all set to vote for him in 2016 until he dropped out. I still love him. I don’t agree 100% with him because hey I’m not a Republican BUT I agree with most of him.

    Also. Brussels sprouts are DELICIOUS. I like them fresh, then brown them in a pan with very very little butter and a great amount of Himalayan pink salt (only salt I use) and maybe some lemon pepper. Drools…. I like to get the outer leaves crispy… oh goodness… now I want some. Yum.

    1. Jo


      Ron Paul was amazing. I dunno, Rand, I used to be a big fan… but he’s not as principled as Ron. He’s more of a real politick flip flop politician… I mean I guess I’m just harder on him because of Ron. In all fairness in that field in 2016… if I was American… I also would have voted for him. He was the best of the bunch. Assuming I didn’t vote for Gary Johnston I mean. Which might have been more likely.

      Brussels sprouted!! *crosses himself*

      I mean I still like you… even though you have some really weird irredeemable (ha ha) habits.

  3. crustytuna


    1. Brussel sprouts are delicious, especially when fried with bacon/pancetta or balsamic. I could eat brussel sprouts all day. Agree to disagree I guess.
    2. I could never do keto. Because carbs are joy. Kudos.
    3. Based on that poster alone, I will never watch The Expanse.
    That is all.

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