[#1] – The Tree of Sorrows – Not to be confused with The Tree of life. Or Knowledge. Or Ugliness.
[#2] Nature – It hates you. I mean it REALLY hates you.
★[#3] Kill the programmers, save the world – Joeys plan to save the world in one fell swoop. Although being the intractable creatures they are it is unlikely they will traverse towards the light enthusiastically and in single file.
[#4] The worst stoic ever – Although probably still a better adherent than Nero… eh… I hope.
[#5] The Gadsen flag – Run up the colors and rally to the banner. Drape me in yellow and mind where you step. A tour d’horizon of the hallowed standard
[#6] The death of a cricket – Casual cruelty, an existential crisis and circling the drain of sociopathy (so basically a Tuesday morning).
[#7] Eat me – And while we start with Douglas Adams we quickly move onto cannibalism.
[#8] Presence of mind – Flutes, bandits and tolerant neighbors. The hallmarks of a great anecdote.
[#9] Hark! The Herald – Over-dramatization and McGyver-ism, subtitled in parseltongue.
[#10] The Threshold of Caring – Not all conflicts are equal. Some are shorter, heftier and harder to find on a map.
[#11] De Kelders – Daytripin’. Sans cultists. Or really anything untoward.
[#12] Mises versus Marx – Arguably the greatest rap battle of all time.
★[#13] Love your anemone – Decrying the lack of a serious nemesis. As one does.
[#14] The Shallow Pond – Drown or get drowned by your sorrows. It could go either way.
[#15] Wisdom of the aged – Learn from my mistakes.
[#16] Anonymity and the power of celebrity – As actors, it is our responsibility to read the newspapers, and then say what we read on television like it’s our own opinion – Team America
[#17] Not Jason – Talking to strangers. (not the Malcolm Gladwell edition)
[#18] An Ode to breakfasts past – Carcinogenic. The flavor that should be wedged in between salty and umami. But isn’t.
[#19] The Real Monkey Business – ‘Filthy monkeys’ – Skippy the magnificent
[#20] The return of the great Nemesis – “Guess who just got back today? Them wild-eyed boys that’d been away. Haven’t changed, had much to say. But man, I still think them cats are crazy”
[#21] Vote for Pedro – ‘If you vote for me all of your wildest dreams will come true’.
★[#22] On Death – ♫ Always look on the bright side… ♪♪
[#23] Promethean – An adjective to aspire to.
[#24] The madness of Don Quixote – The best kind of the madness. If one was to rank them in order of preference.
[#25] Running up that Hill – Starting your day with an early morning run is a great way to make sure your day can’t get worse than it started.
[#26] Playing with Fire – Monkeys, swords and Klatchian fire engines.
[#27] It can’t rain all the time – When you’ve been here before. It less scary.
[#28] Panacea – I don’t like the drugs. But the drugs like me. Or words to that effect.
[#29] Counts and getting counted – One two buckle my shoe. Three four don’t answer the door.
[#30] Capitalism doesn’t work – Cautiously raising a hand to dispute the zeitgeist.
[#31] A coping mechanism – to fortify your fragile bulwark against the Monday morning suck.