Looking back on forty+ years of existence I have learned… eh… learnt… (dammit)… realized a couple of things. (this wisdom will now be dispensed in point form forthwith)
- Don’t chop up chilies and then go down on your wife (or probably anyone for that matter)
- Heel cream is NOT toothpaste, even when enclosed in similar packaging with similar viscosity
- If it tastes funny, stop brushing.
- Your child vomiting on you is less onerous than your date vomiting on you. (which is very onerous… especially if you’re both naked)
- Operating on yourself with a pair of nail scissors may not lead to optimum results
- And also infection.
- And finally… your co-workers may be smarter than you give them credit for…
(This decoy didn’t work. Or rather, didn’t work for as long as I had intended)
Go Darke 
15 responses to “Wisdom of the aged”
Sounds like you’re on the right track!
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Thanks, sometimes it feels like the express train tho… blasting through all the stations you thought you might want to get off and have a look around for a bit
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Best in those cases to just hang on to the bar and wait until it really does come to a complete stop. I’d hate for you to break both your ankles with a hasty… erhm …dismount
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I always stick the dismount. Ha ha ha.
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Hahaha!! Practice makes perfect??
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Yeah, although its only a two minute routine. Lol.
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Whoa Whoa Whoa – waaaaaayyy tooo much information!!!! 😆
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Wait… we’re still talking about gymnastics right? I always pictured myself as one of those lithe fourteen year olds with the ribbon… and the hula hoop.
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uuummm… we were NEVER talking about gymnastics! LMFAO
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Girls and their inyourendos. *flounces off in a huff*
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Hey come back here! I’m not done with you!
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Its sleepy time for Joey. Good night. And good luck. Did you lock the truck? Better go check. Heh heh he…
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A lot of your wisdom seems to be mouth-fixated… I hope the rest of your body wises up at some point!
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That is very Freudian. Well spotted! I don’t have much hope for improvement though… being as old as I am now. You can’t teach an old dog new tricks. Or something like that 😀
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Woof!
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