On Certainty and taking Offence, Derren Brown beautifully sums up the modus operandi for my entire life…
Excessive conviction is a trap our natures have set for all of us, and its scarlet distension is usually evident on both sides of any dispute. When I wrangle with my partner over who has more neglected the pile of Thursday’s plates with their yellowed and bumpy terrain of stiffened Port Salut, and whether the more contemptible crime is omitting to load the dishwasher or forgetting to unload it, I engage in a join-the-dots exercise in selective storytelling. In my tale, my responsible nature emerges as self-evident, a kind of constitutional benevolence punctuated by forgivable, even endearing oversights. My partner’s pattern, on the other hand, is one of persistent hypocrisy and neglect, and his rare moments of dependability are welcome but baffling incongruous.
I conjure this exaggerated contrast in our natures not because I actually believe it, but because my response to an accusation is to twitchily secure all doors and windows, blocking any access to the shame that comes with admission of fault. We argue because we are both affronted, each scrabbling to present the more compelling fiction. In anger or defensiveness, honest ambiguity is the enemy we are fortified by the certainty that only comes fiction. We concoct stories regarding the motivations of even those we are supposed to love the most – tales that may bear little relation to reality.
-A book of secrets, Derren Brown, Bantam Press, 2021
I love Magicians, Penn and Teller (whose libertarian and godless tendencies I adhere to) and Derren Brown, whose books on philosophy and life I have really come to appreciate. I’ve read all but one of his books (I think). Neil Patrick Harris is also great. Now that I’m thinking about (gay) Magicians who are virtuosos in other fields.
Magicians often have a keen insight into people. Especially mentalists and illusionists. They know how our (human) minds work and how we interpret the stimuli presented to us. I find that ability fascinating. Why wasn’t I wired with that level of perception I rage? Because you got a huge penis instead… which, I must be honest, is less useful to me now in my old age. Maybe godlike perception and manual dexterity and a few extra points of IQ might have been the better trade. Oh and math. I wish I could add… and subtract and do some of those other things. That would be epic.
Oh I found my bookmark. (a remnant from my last trip overseas… which seems sooooooooooooo long ago now)
The portrait is that of Hideyo Noguchi. Who is a Japanese (weirdly enough) bacteriologist who discovered syphilis.
Syphilis is the cold sore on the end of your Willy right?
I google it. Woah…. THAT was a mistake.
Jesus. HOW do you let it get so bad?
I must be honest, that is one good thing about monogamy. Don’t have to worry about that… genre of concerns anymore.
Hot-damn
+++
Go Darke 