A statistical anomaly

I rarely look at my WordPress stats. This is less of a self imposed rule and perhaps more of a sense of nonchalance or ambivalence I have towards statistics. While this information is useful (I’m sure) for bloggers who want to up their readership and appeal to a certain segment in the market, I use my blog primarily as a form of procrastination (and therefore, have no real readership goals or expectations). For example, right now, I should be attending the scary amount of (real) work I have clogging my todo list but instead I’m clacking away at the keys… achieving nothing of real consequence (again).

When I opened my WordPress dashboard this morning however, something caught my eye in the stats section under Search terms.

little maigre fucking blowjob

Wait.. what?

I had to google what maigre meant.

maigre. 1 : being a day on which the eating of flesh is forbidden by the Roman Catholic Church.

Which, as you can imagine, confuses me even more. (in all fairness it doesn’t take a lot) I’m assuming this must be a typo. Although the rest of the search term also upsets me. Don’t you normally search for blowjobs or fucking? (there might be some personal proclivity reveal here, ha ha) Maybe they meant meagre? In any event, I have now (annoyingly) spent a fair bit of time wondering what some paedophile* meant when he hamfisted his google search.

* I realise paedophilia refers to a prepubescent. But the ‘little’ in the search term tends to bend me towards labeling them as such.

In any event. Googling this phrase myself fortunately doesn’t bring up my blog. (It does however probably flag me on some sort of database) I will continue to ponder this strange occurrence while the basset rests his head on my head.

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Perhaps with our combined intellect we can solve this enigma. (Don’t get your hopes up, the basset hound has actually now fallen asleep, which leaves only the dumber member of our dynamic cross species duo to ponder) Netflix said they doubted it would gain much traction after I pitched them our ‘detective’ show idea. Admittedly the premise of the pilot was us mostly lying on the sofa eating potato chips. We may have to go full YouTube…

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 It’s going to be epic.

 

Comments

  1. This will probably have little to with your blog but for a few sentences actually. And I’m gong to be annoyingly analytical for absolutely no reason other than I enjoy doing it with things that make no real difference in my life. Lol 🤷‍♀️
    It always catches my mind when people make comments like you did initially here, not ever reading your stats. I think when people make comments on their own personal habits or behaviors makes me think about my own. “What do I do?” when faced with similar or exact circumstances? And why do others do it differently? Self analysis and the intrigue in people being people are both strong and alive inside me on a regular basis so I attribute this windy comment to that and well, recuperation from near death and my mind need exercises. Ha
    I do look at stats page. But as I read your reasons that you said people might do that I didn’t fit into the categories. I actually do it as part of a routine. Which is interestingly highlighting my OCD. (Ive worked on my OCD for years trying to make it workable and livable in my life. And please know I don’t mean I check the locks on my front door ten times or clean my house like mad in the middle of the night, my ocd was/is much more severe than that and I won’t go into details for my own sake. But let’s just say the effects took a toll on my sanity and my body)
    I look at every page of my WordPress every time I log on, not just stats. But I check everything that WordPress has allowed or given me that I’m aware of, even the spam folder. Lol. I don’t even understand half of the stats page 😬 and other things WordPress has and sometimes I ask people or sometimes I just note that I don’t understand it in my multitude of my volumes of personal mental stupidity notebooks in my head.
    Which led me to the conclusion that there are likely a ton of reasons people utilize what WordPress has to offer and some are less predictable than others. 🤷‍♀️

    This concludes the chronicles of Erroneous Choices. 😳 Everyone lived happily ever after and amen.

    That is an adorable picture by the way.

    1. That is quite a comment. Let me start with ‘thanks’ for the compliment! It is all true. I am very adorable. (I’m so glad someone gets me) ha ha!

      With that bit of egotism out of the way…

      Interestingly you never struck me as someone who struggles with OCD. (And trust me, I appreciate that obsessive compulsive disorder comes in many guises) In all honesty you’ve always just struck me as quite remarkable… insofar as despite all your… (what’s the right word)… challenges early on… you’ve turned it into something pretty good (from what I can tell)

      I’m inclined to elevate you to paragon of accomplishment.

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